amelia (mmmbopthis) wrote,

Blah. I miss Roger. He is being all weird and Taurus-y. I really miss him! He keeps touching Naima like he used to do to me, just being all weird. Am I jealous, or does he want her? God, that would be aweful. Just because i would miss him and spending time with him all that much more. I don't know what I am saying, I hung out with him last night. It is just like, until last weekend, we always looked for eachother and spent all of our time together, and now, i don't know...we just don't. Okay, it hasn't even been a week. And, it isn't like I want him (that much) anymore. I just miss him!

I thought a lot about chance today. Was I a bitch? I miss him too! He hasn't called me or emailed me or anything. He moved in with his sister, Shantee. I want to talk to him. His friend has his MSN profile now, and I talked a little to him today, but he told me to call Eric, because he always talks to him about that kind of thing. So, I might do that tomorrow. I miss him. But my sensible side tells me not to go near him. Of course, it isn't his fault he is a gemini. I swear.

Maybe I just miss the arms around me. Someone. Anyone. I got asked out by one of my customers today. He just wanted to hang out sometime. Some random guy, totally not my type. He was all nervous and cute, though. I gave him my number. And on Thursday, I am going to the movies to get drunk with Andy, a guy from work. He reminds me a lot of Justin#1. Really creepy. I wrote a little bit about him in earlier entries. The one who I thought I was pregnant with his kid and I had names picked out and everything. Totally not cool.

Speaking of prego, my friend Danielle is with child. Not Roger's Danielle, no freakin' way. The one that I homestayed with during band camp. Her BF lives in Corvallis, and they have only been together for at max. 5 months. I can't believe it! I couldn't handle being prego right now. And she doesn't even care. SHe is keeping the kid, but she isn't sad about it at all. I couldn't imagine bringing a child into this world unprepared. That is so irresponsible. It is rude. Go figure, though, I am one of those kind of people that need to plan years ahead...haha. JK.

Everything else is okay. I am in one of those half-assed emo moods where you float in and out of being all bummin'. Blah. I just feel all socially inept. Like I can't do anything correct right now. Blah. I am a failure to the humane race. Am I just one ugly blob? I quit. No more trying to attract guys. They SO aren't worth my time. For what, anyway? The only guy I need I have, my dear Oliver Wood. He is so hot. No, really, I give up. I must have fallen out of the attractive tree or something, because everyone has someone but me. Am I just that boring and difficult and not hot or something?

Blah. I hate dealing with people. That's why I have Radiohead. My new insta-fave band.
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