amelia (mmmbopthis) wrote,

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Exciting trip to the emergency room last night at three am resulted in...nothing. They sent me home.

Pretty blah and I feel I have nothing really to say. All I have is feelings. I'm too chickenshit to just say "let's hang out." Meh, the life I lead.

I think of people I have known and wonder if, in retrospect, if I could have helped them. Help him. I know he won't be happy. He's so young. He needs to live life and not be tied down. I'm so pissed. I mean, I love him and his family, but he seems content. And maybe I just never got in his head enough. We were young, I love his family in a hugely-could-never-date-again way. I just don't want him to be unhappy. Because it seems that he won't be living, just surviving. And that is no way to bring a child into this world. But you know what? If he loves her, then fuck it and fuck the world. Good for him.
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