amelia (mmmbopthis) wrote,

background stuff

Okay, well, this is the first entry. yeah, well, all of my friends are going away to college. Not like I won't be, it just...yeah, I am leaving in a month and they are all leaving, like, next week. So, I am totally melancholy about the whole thing and wondering why my friends and I haven't hung out more than just in the last month. and then I think, "what the hell are you thinking?" Yeah, I have been busy trying to woo Paul...and then there was the whole Justin # 1 and Justin #2 thing. Which was horrid. J1 wasn't bad...okay, I met the three of them at a party. Well, J2 came later. But I met Paul at a party and we kind of had a thing until he decided to tell me that he has a 16 year old love of his life or something like that. Well, he is 24. He also has a 2 year old son, from another girl (who I am thoroughly convinced hates me). So, his friend Justin #1 and I kind of hooked up, and we hung out a lot and were basically an item but not really until he moved away about a month ago. And then, his friend J2 came along, and that was just bad news and I am glad that him and Paul's sister Jonna hung out or whatever before she had to go back to Montana...oh, God, that is another thing. Paul invited me to go to Montana with him, J2, and another guy, John, for five days...which won't be that bad, except we are dropping Paul off in Portland on the way back (along with J2)...and I was stupid enough not to realize why until two days ago...his gf lives there. His excuse is that he is going to a sonic youth concert...yeah, whatever. I don't know. He is convinced that I am not going to move to Eugene, that I am gonna stay here. He invited me to move in with him, but I think he was just joking about that. I don't know about minute he is totally focused on me, and the next, he is checking his email to see if his gf emailed him. Of course, we are completely convinced that she doesn't exist. Whatever. It isn't like he cheated on her, because they weren't official at the time of our "whatever", but yeah, it kind of sucked to find out that way...

So, I am just hanging out, feeling sorry for myself, which is dumb, because I am gonna go hang out with Jessica in a matter of hours, and we have hung out some during the sommer, despite both of our schedules. why can't I just get off my lazy ass and get a car? Oh, I liscense. Whatever. I am gonna miss all my friends incredibly much. My best friend, Sarah, was all, "well, if I never see you again, have a nice life". That's a little definate, is it not? Good Lord, I can't believe that it is all over. I am a little apprehensive about the whole college thing. But, then again, it IS Eugene (University of Oregon, on a full ride). Pot-smoking(well, I don't do that, but still), tree-hugging, web-footed hippies. Yeah, sounds like me. I am just worried that my roommate is some hung-up, straight edge bandnerd. I am the first to admite that I like to have fun and party...duh! I don't smoke pot, not my thing, but what if my roomie goes crazy about it??? It IS eugene, I keep having to tell myself. Come on, amelia. Get with it. Of course, I am in the musician's hall. I wanted that at the time that I signed up for my dorms, and it *IS* a nice hall, I just don't want a whole lot of uptight bandnerds that play their instruments all the time. I am not even sure about the whole marching band thing. Even if Nike IS giving us oregon Marching Band I really want to devote all of my time to that? That is a huge chunk of time. And Chris Sommer. Good Lord. I don't know if I can handle being in the same room with him again. Although, when I was there for freshman orientation, I talked to some of the hardcore OMB veterans, and they all seemed really cool and laid back. They also told me that, in answer to my Chris question, that EVERYONE makes fun of him, anyway, so I would just join the ranks of the hard-core CS hate-club. Which, in a way, does have it's comraderie-style appeal. whatever.

SO, this is me, pissed off at my ex boyfriend, Chance, who was totally elated to hear from me and wanted to hang out with me since me moved to Seattle, but then, his bitchy-half-assed gf gets online, and was all, "it would be weird if you went to go see him and stayed in his house, knowing what you two have done." So, she was pissed off at him for a butt-load of other stuff, so I encouraged her to call him, and even gave her the number. She is seeing different guys, anyway!!! Well, I called him just to make sure that he wanted me to come see him, and he was all, "Don't bother coming to see me. I know that you still like me and I don't want it to be weird when you come see me," and he hung up the phone. First of all, the bitch needs to get off his case, because he totally wanted to hang out with me until she called him. Second, I didn't like him at the time, I was with J1! And third, I didn't think that it would be weird at all. We got really close after she ledt for Alaska, even though he was moving, we hung out a lot and I thought we would just be friends. Whatever, asshole. If you are reading this, kiss my ass. I have better things to do than to sit around waiting for you to grow up. And then, to make matters worse, bitch, I mean Steph, gets online and hassles me..."are you mad at me??" Of couse I am mad at you? Do you not understand? I didn't want to get down his the words HANGING OUT translate into HAVING SEX on your screen? Can you read properly? I had no intention of getting back together with him, and now that she opened her goddamn mouth, he doesn't want to see me. And then she tried to make things all better. DON'T FUCKING WORRY IF SOMEONE IS MAD AT YOU! God, it's not a big deal. You fucked things over, yes, and don't expect me to love you still, but that doesn't mean you have to go trying to make everything better. I hope you two work out; you are both selfish and stupid and need to grow up.
Wow, I told you all I was meloncholy today...hahahaha...that sucks. Thank God I am not at home. I don't have a bad home life at all, my parents...well, my moms...Kym and my real mom...grr...
And, last, but certainly not least, I am having Harry Potter withdrawls. I finished all four books, but I left the movie at my friend's house (HEATHER!!!!), so now I am reduced to listening to the soundtrack and starting to series over again. And the guy who plays Oliver Wood is so damn cute. Tee hee!!!
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