amelia (mmmbopthis) wrote,
amelia
mmmbopthis

life lessons

PSA: This is an observation, not a pity party. Please, if you choose to, reply accordingly.

I've learned that the people that annoy me the most are the people I have the most to learn from. Mostly *coughgeminiscough*

My boss teaches me how NOT to engage in office politics, my dad teaches me...stuff...and my gramma teaches me how to love life. The exthatshallnotbenamed teaches me patience, what makes a douche, and how I shouldn't godmod. All good life lessons.

Each day lately is a journey to find happiness, to find balance, to find solace in my own life. Let's be honest: there's a chance I'm out of remission, and I live with it every day. This time, it's not just in the back of my mind, but it's a very real possibility and I may have another biopsy coming up next week. I'm fucking scared shitless.

But I can't decide if I'm just bummed because that's what a week in the hospital does to you, or if I am coming to terms with my own inevitability, because I'm having a really hard time keeping the positive light. I figure I should probably see one of those blokes over at the health center, but we don't have a good relationship (in that I find every single person at the Student Health Center extremely stupid)...maybe it's something I just need to get through? Or do I actively need to be saying my little affirmations? Or is all hope lost because I can't see it in myself anymore?

God this is all so fucked up.

But, Pirates make it all better. Lots of pirates and fun will be had this weekend. So there.
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 8 comments