Ugh...I didn't MEAN to be a heinous bitch this summer. I didn't mean to alienate all my friends. I didn't mean to cause a rift. That's right. The only reason I didn't bring it up sooner was that of all the places that I enjoy drama in my life, drama at home is the LAST place I would seek it. Honestly. I rustled feathers when I didn't mean to. But you know what? I think I deserve a place where I can go and I won't be bothered by people coming over. I'm very fucking sensitive about being bald. Yeah, that's right. I just started a "do you know what it's like...?" sentence. Nope. Not gonna do it. It's just that there are limitations, reservations, hopes, fears...just everything. I've become sooo self conscious. And I know I shouldn't, especially with my friends...but I just pretty much want to tell 90% of the world to fuck off and crawl under a rock. Yeah, that's right. 90 percent.
I think my problem is that I can't stand living with men. They invade my bubble. I don't care who it is or what my relationship to said male is, living in this small of a space with a penis (and a body attached) does not do a body good. First it was paul (the boy who I seriously considered marrying), and then it was andrew (and while I did not directly "kick him out", I raged, and I felt bad, but I said what I felt needed to be said). I only wonder what this will set me up for in the future. Haha. Only one more thing to add to the list of why boys should stay the hell away from me if they know what's good for them.
Work tomorrow at 6:30 AM. Yes, AM. As in, 9 hours. What the fuck have I gotten myself into??? And then tabling at the Humpy Lumpy lawn from 10-3. For APO. By myself. Fall rush will be pretty small if I'm the only one recruiting, "join, or else, you snivelling freshman bastards!" Yes, I feel I am a good ambassador for those brats. Bring em on.