I'm "home" (read: The Coos aka Coos Bay) and I found all my old journals. This was all pre-LJ, where I readily expressed my inner most embarrassing thoughts. I found ten (yes, count them, ten) journals, all filled, from 7th-12th grade. Hardcore journaling. In one of my sr year ones dropped a piece of printer paper with three emails.
Hey, I asked about the college thing because I wanted to try and work something out with you about this whole college in different states because I love you so much and I am like you and don't want it to end so soon...I don't know...maybe we split up but keep in contact. Then after I graduate from college see how things are with me and my life in Washington. If it's nothing worth while [eta: washington] then moving back to Oregon again...I think that there might be something more then we know between us. I think it will all work out in the end. At least I hope so. I love you...I love you a lot more than you love me and I have never felt this way about anyone before. I just want to see where we stand in a year. I didn't mean as you being my backup plan. I am sorry if it came out like that. Chance
(these are the basic points of all three emails wrapped nicely into one long thought from him).
Makes you wonder if he feels the same way. Or was he lying? Has it changed? For what it's worth, it was worth all the while. Or so says Green Day.
Stoked about le benefit tonight.
Jeanne: Suz and I saw Jayce last night. It was...interesting. He's stoked about hanging out with you next year, so don't leave him hanging!
PSA: assholes at Edgewireless had the nerve to tell me that I indeed didn't have cancer and that Paul was lying. OMG. I hate them. I got all up in her business. Anyway, the point is, my phone service from edgewireless in coos bay is ending friday the thirteenth. Because shit like that always works out like that. I'm pissed, but maybe I can strike a deal that doesn't involve paying my ex 40 bucks a month. Gah.